A ginormous hiccup in the flow of life

I was sitting in the office enjoying a cup of coffee and reading my emails. Our kitchen helper, who is really my right-hand at the Family Place, walked in and said she needed to talk to me! Couldn't possibly be good news): She informed me that she would be leaving by the end of the month to go to Lebanon to study theology. I was shocked and my mind started to run wild thinking of how I would replace her. She knows how to make fresh bread and soup and chocolate chip cookies. She knows which customers like ketchup and which ones like mayonnaise. I've spent over a year training her to do things the way I like them. The thought of training a new girl is overwhelming. Granted, she didn't always do things the way I like and she was lazy at times but I still love her and feel very sad that she's leaving. I decided not to make a hasty decision but to think it through and give myself time to pray and ask the right questions. If you're reading this blog, would you pray with us that we'll get the perfect girl to replace her and that I'll have time to train her well before I leave for the US in a few weeks? I really didn't need this right now but God had other plans and evidently thought I could handle just a little bit more stress in my life. Ah, thanks for hanging in there with me! Isn't this life fun?? 

feeling a little overwhelmed yet not crushed

I know it's been forever since I've written anything here. Can't say I've made a new year's resolution to write more or anything like that. Just stopping by to say hello to all my readers who have probably long left me. I thought a blog would be a great way to express myself but alas, it only makes me feel guilty for not writing on it. (not really that guilty) Life here is just a bit overwhelming most of the time. What makes it feel overwhelming right now? The list is long but some of the things are: trying to keep up with the needs of a large team (and feeling like a failure always), running a business that largely depends on me and figuring out how to turn things over when I leave, thinking about yet another move in the summer to a new place 7 hours away, 5 weeks of tour looming in the near future with lots of messages to prepare and feeling like I have nothing to say, relationships I should be pursuing or following up, way too many emails to answer and many of them people who want to come and visit & see the work here, the budget process for two teams coming up this month. There are more but I won't take time to list them all. I often say to myself "is this the abundant life that Christ promised me?" It occurs to me that abundant life isn't about our circumstances or our agendas and calendars. It's a state of the heart where we are at peace with our maker, knowing that we have given him the first fruits and are trusting him daily, hourly to lead our steps and give us wisdom in our choices. I think this is something that needs practice just like anything else and it then becomes a habit. As I daily take up my cross and follow him, he teaches me how to live abundantly. What a crazy paradox this is. To the world it is foolishness but to us, it is abundant life! So we keep pressing on. I am 57 years old and I should have this down by now, no? Maybe I'll finally get it right in 2014. Happy New Year to all my dear friends.

blogger's cramp

I realize I have become a failure at blogging! Believe it or not, I have written dozens of them in my head but I guess that doesn't count if you can't read them! I'm pretty sure many of my regular readers have quit checking this site and I don't blame you!! Now my busy life has taken a completely different turn; I have my daughter and grandson living with me. It is totally wonderful but with an 8-month old in the house, he usually trumps all and demands our attention so the little work I might have gotten done, goes by the wayside. Darrell has been gone for a month of tour in the US and it would have been a miserably long month had I not had the company of my daughter & grandson. I can't think of anything in the world that brings more joy than being a grandma! Perhaps because of my up-bringing as an MK and the myriad of goodbye's and separations that I endured as a child, I find myself always thinking about them leaving and how terrible it will be. They are still here for at least 3 more months but I constantly wonder how I will endure saying goodbye to this precious little human being who has captivated my heart forever. It will be terrible, I know, but I also know that many other grandma's have survived the separation and kept the bond alive and strong. Sometimes, (well, lots of times) I dream of just living a "normal" life and not being torn from my children and grandchildren all the time. I realize there are many grandparents in the US that only see their children and grandchildren once or twice a year but somehow it's different being on the other side of the world. Ah, this life of pain and separation...but we press on:)

Sidelined in the news

Many of you probably have no idea that our country is in major turmoil right now. Because of other major news events this past week, I'm pretty sure you're not seeing our country in the headlines of the Nightly News. Nevertheless, we have seen an important opposition leader assassinated in front of his house and 8 soldiers tortured and killed within the past week. Even before that, there were demonstrations in the streets but these events fueled the anger of the people and there are now 100's of 1000's of people out in the streets every night demanding the overthrow of the government. They are fed up and angry with how things are going. The pot has been boiling for some time and now the lid has blown. We usually avoid large crowds and realize the potential danger of frequenting such places, but last night we decided to take a walk down (it's 3 blocks from our house) and see what all the noise was about. Hundreds of cars and people walking, filled the streets in every direction, flags flying, popcorn vendors, loudspeakers...it was a huge party and the atmosphere was electrifying. My friend told me earlier in the day that no one should be in his house but everyone should take to the streets. We decided to join the rest of the city! Who knows where this all will lead but to be sure, we are in for a bumpy ride over the next weeks and months. Here's what's going on every night, right down the street from our home.

A weekend to remember

On the spur of the moment, having seen a good friend's wedding announced on Facebook, we decided to jump on a plane and fly to Istanbul to attend the event! When we told our friend that we would be coming, he was so thrilled and we were excited to be part of this special day. It meant the world to the family. Our friend gave us the address of the wedding hall which was 4 lines long. We were landing in Istanbul at 11:30PM so decided to get a hotel near the airport and then ask someone about the address the next day. We learned that it was about 1 1/2 hours away and we'd need to take a taxi, several buses and then walk. We were amazed at how friendly & helpful everyone was and we made it to the correct place 15 minutes early. It was so great to see many old friends from Kurdistan and to be part of this great event in the life of our dear friend. It also made us sad that we were no longer part of this group of people that we love dearly. I couldn't believe how my Kurdish language (limited as it is!) came flooding back and I understood so much. An interesting part of the Turkish culture (which is where the bride comes from) is that they put satin ribbons around the necks of the bride & groom and all the wedding guests went through the line and pinned money and gold to the ribbons. They were loaded with $100 bills and other currency plus tons of gold. After the wedding ceremony which was very short, we all made our way to a restaurant down the street where there was lots of food, drink and dancing. We had to leave by 10PM because we were afraid the public transportation would stop running and didn't know how it would be getting back to our hotel late at night. The party was still going strong and no doubt lasted several more hours. The Kurds are great dancers and although I thought I had forgotten how to do the Kurdish dance, it came right back to me and was so much fun! Ah, we love these people and miss being with them. It was a great weekend and we were so glad we went. I wanted to post a video here but it's not working so you'll just have to imagine how fun it was:)

My morning walk

Often in the morning when I walk from my house to work at the Family Place, I formulate a blog entry in my mind. It is a very short walk, maybe less than 5 minutes but it is full of sights & sounds & smells that need to be described for you in order to fully comprehend what I experience each day. On the corner down from my house is a cafe (there's one on just about every corner) where men line the sidewalk, drinking their tiny cups of espresso, playing cards and smoking their cigarettes. Two feet from them is raw sewage running in the middle of the street and I have to gingerly walk way around it to avoid stepping in it. The smell is so gross and I try to imagine what it must be like for those men sitting there drinking their coffee! How can they possibly be enjoying it with that smell?? There is a sidewalk from my house all the way to the FP and the safest thing would be to stay on it so I don't get hit by cars speeding by on the narrow little road. But the sidewalk is full of cars and garbage so I usually have to walk in the road. The other day one of those fast cars actually knocked my purse off my shoulder.  The garbage situation in our city has gone from bad to worse. On the other side of the narrow road is a train track. Along the fence that separates the road from the train track is where people hang their garbage. Large, mangy cats rip open these bags and spill the contents out into the road. Some of those mangy cats can be found dead on that narrow road, having been hit by those speeding cars. I find myself thanking God every time I arrive safely at the Family Place! Just another day in our crazy lives...

Bombarded

Lately the workers in our country have been bombarded with sickness and disease. There is hardly a day goes by that we don't hear of someone else who has been admitted to the hospital, given a diagnosis of cancer, broken a bone or had some unusual fall or mishap. The workers that have left this country since we arrived are more numerous than those that have arrived. Satan is attacking in the area of health and we desperately need you, our prayer warriors, to fight for us in prayer. Pray for a hedge of good health to surround us. Pray against discouragement for many who are having to leave because of serious illness. It is likewise demoralizing for those that are left behind. We are reminded of how temporary this life is and how in a moment, everything can change; all our plans, hopes and dreams. We look to the author of our faith and we once again declare that He does all things well, even when we are baffled and confused. Thank you for not abandoning us here! We're counting on you.