feeling a little overwhelmed yet not crushed

I know it's been forever since I've written anything here. Can't say I've made a new year's resolution to write more or anything like that. Just stopping by to say hello to all my readers who have probably long left me. I thought a blog would be a great way to express myself but alas, it only makes me feel guilty for not writing on it. (not really that guilty) Life here is just a bit overwhelming most of the time. What makes it feel overwhelming right now? The list is long but some of the things are: trying to keep up with the needs of a large team (and feeling like a failure always), running a business that largely depends on me and figuring out how to turn things over when I leave, thinking about yet another move in the summer to a new place 7 hours away, 5 weeks of tour looming in the near future with lots of messages to prepare and feeling like I have nothing to say, relationships I should be pursuing or following up, way too many emails to answer and many of them people who want to come and visit & see the work here, the budget process for two teams coming up this month. There are more but I won't take time to list them all. I often say to myself "is this the abundant life that Christ promised me?" It occurs to me that abundant life isn't about our circumstances or our agendas and calendars. It's a state of the heart where we are at peace with our maker, knowing that we have given him the first fruits and are trusting him daily, hourly to lead our steps and give us wisdom in our choices. I think this is something that needs practice just like anything else and it then becomes a habit. As I daily take up my cross and follow him, he teaches me how to live abundantly. What a crazy paradox this is. To the world it is foolishness but to us, it is abundant life! So we keep pressing on. I am 57 years old and I should have this down by now, no? Maybe I'll finally get it right in 2014. Happy New Year to all my dear friends.