A new kind of normal

A week ago someone called me and asked if I'd do an ultrasound on a worker who was new in the country and seemed to be having a miscarriage. The young girl came to my house and after checking her, I saw evidence that she was indeed still pregnant. I didn't want to get her hopes up since she was bleeding pretty heavily and cramping too. A few more days went by and things weren't much better so I checked her again. The gestational sac had doubled in size so I was really stumped but still couldn't see a clear fetus. I decided to take her to a "private" hospital to see my friends' sister who is a doctor. The doctor was insistent that no one would come in the room with her but I insisted and pushed my way in. There were no fewer than 10 women in the room with a woman in labor, yelling loudly. They told this girl to take her clothes off and get up on the table. (the table was way across the room) We looked at her like "right here, in front of everyone?" Of course, it's normal. She dutifully undressed and walked across the room in front of all those women. She checked her and was pretty sure she had miscarried and said she would need a D&C. Praise the Lord she let her wait a few more days to see what would happen. The girl laid in bed pretty much for 5 days, the bleeding stopped and she began feeling very nauseous. Tonight I went over to her house with my portable machine and did another ultrasound on her. Funny side note is that there is only one plug in the bedroom and it couldn't reach the machine so we had to do the ultrasound on the floor. Normal. Sure enough, there was a baby, big as life with a strong heartbeat! How exciting for this young couple, far away from home in a rather primitive place. The thought that that doctor was ready to do a D&C is pretty scary! I believe that she could have been carrying twins and miscarried one of them. Praise the Lord for my portable ultrasound machine which was bought many years ago with Alliance Women's money. It has been a blessing to so many women and continues to be. Thank you!

The real Kurd'sh New Year

Here, Dec. 31st is considered Christmas and March 21 is New Year's. So this was the weekend for huge celebrations. We had no idea what we were in for but were told that everyone wears traditional Kurd'sh clothes so we dutifully went to the bazaar & bought them. Friday we got dressed up in our garb and went downtown to a certain street that was blocked from traffic and where the party would happen. When we arrived, we were shocked to see literally hundreds of thousands of people walking the street in their beautiful, colorful clothes. The party basically consisted of walking for 3 hours or more, up and down the street. At certain points we could not even move one inch because of the crowds. Surprisingly, in those mobs of people we saw quite a few that we knew. In fact, we started out with just 3 of us and by the time friends started joining our group, we were more than 10. There were random groups of people dancing all over the streets with loud music, food & drink stands,and just an incredible air of celebration everywhere. We even saw a large group of US soldiers and they greeted us warmly. I actually forgot that I was wearing high heels until after about 3 hours and then my feet started killing me. It also started raining so we were walking very fast to get somewhere out of the rain! We finally decided to go back to a friends' workplace and eat at the cafeteria there. It was a perfect end to a fun day as we sat around and relaxed, ate a delicious meal and drank tea. We arrived home exhausted but so happy. Little did we know what lay in store the following day...
Saturday morning we awoke to pouring rain and dark, cloudy skies. We had a picnic planned with lots of friends in the mountains. It seemed our plans would be ruined but we delayed an hour and decided to go for it; the internet said sunny & 68 degrees so, although we don't always believe the internet we hoped they were right. By the time we arrived at our destination, the sun was beginning to peek through and it actually became hot after a few hours. We found a gorgeous place, overlooking a lake and set up camp. The scenery was breath-taking. The hills were alive with people covering just about every square meter but we had lots of room to spread out. It was a picture-perfect day and so much fun to enjoy God's nature after a long winter. We are truly blessed with wonderful friends here and we long for them all to someday join our family. From the time we left our house until we got home at night, it was 13 hours; a pretty long day but oh so much fun. I'll include a short video here of some of us singing around the traditional New Year's fire! There was dancing going on from the first hour until the last and it got wilder as the night went on. These people know how to have fun! We look forward to lots more picnics this Spring as we've been told that every Friday we'll be heading to the mountains with our friends. Let the good times roll..

Bittersweet visit

I'm afraid I'm losing my readers since you probably check so often here and find nothing new! Sorry about that but I really have been crazy busy, being away from home for 3 weeks in Thailand and then Jordan. Now it's back to real life and I must say I've had a hard time getting back into the swing of things.
I want to tell you about a visit I had to Aqaba. Of course it was nostalgic for us as we drove into that city (where, by the way, we were sure we'd stay until we retired!). Within a short time of our arrival the phone began to ring with friends wanting to see us. A beach party was planned to get several of our friends together in one place for us to see. It was wonderful to reconnect with so many and to see some BIG changes in the hearts of some. It was also very wonderful to be able to communicate freely in the language I love. I didn't realize how frustrated I've been not to be able to talk to people about meaningful things! (It made me more determined to learn this new language) Sitting on the beach at sunset talking about my best friend to a group of people who are hungry for truth was so rewarding. I spent other times with different friends and had some incredible conversations, talks I can't imagine happening just a year ago. There are so many opportunities in this city and so many open people that I felt a bit sad that we weren't still there. The good thing is that as we boarded the plane in Jordan and headed back to this place, I felt like I was coming home. I had a deep sense of THIS being where God wants me right now. I also know that I give my heart away very easily and find that anywhere God puts me I quickly put down roots & fall in love with the people and culture. It is good to be at peace.

Morning with a friend

Today is the usual day for my Kurdish lesson but instead I asked my language helper if she'd be willing to go with me to the bazaar. I really don't like going down there because I don't know my way around but I needed to buy a Kurdish outfit for the upcoming New Years' celebration in March. On this day, everyone wears their traditional clothes to show pride in their culture and history. We drove down and parked the car and then walked through mud and filth to get to the "fabric bazaar". It was a beautiful sunny day today but yesterday was rainy and thus the mud. I have never seen so many fabric stores and colors & glitter as I saw today. I was so sad to find that I only had room for one photo on my camera but let me describe our morning for you. We went from shop to shop, looking at dozens of patterns. After seeing the color that I wanted, we began to bargain for the price. My friend was a master at it and I didn't have to say a word. I wasn't aware of all the other things that go with this outfit. After buying the fabric, we headed for the accessories' bazaar. It is the oldest bazaar in our city and I wish I had a picture. You enter through a narrow opening and head down tiny little alleyways lined with shops that have so much gold and glitter that you can't see anything. Most prefer to make their own necklaces and there are 1000's of little cups full of beads that women choose from and carry off in little white envelopes. I chose 2 necklaces to go with my outfit and paid about $3.00 for both. Then I needed a belt I was told. My friend insisted on buying the belt as a gift. It was more expensive ($20) and really nice. I then needed special open-toed shoes to go with the outfit. Unfortunately they didn't have my size so I'll have to look elsewhere. I was very pleased with my purchases and we headed back to the car to go and visit her sister where a seamstress friend would be waiting for us. As we unpacked our wares and showed them the fabric and accessories, they were thrilled with my choice and congratulated me on buying my first Kurdish clothing. After taking my measurements, we sat and had tea and cookies, then left for home after a long morning out. I'm sure I learned way more language being out with people all morning than I would have with my notebook & pen in hand. It was a wonderful experience and I bonded even more with these people and their rich culture. You'll be hearing lots about our No Roz celebration on March 21st and many more pictures to follow. This one is of my tutor and friend, Hanna, in front of the accessory booth where I bought some of my things.

another morning in the hospital:)

This morning when I arrived at the maternity hospital, it seemed quiet and not as many patients as usual. I thought it would be a slow, rather boring day but all of a sudden women starting coming out of the woodwork and just about every delivery bed was full! At one point during the morning there were 3 women delivering in the same room, side by side and all screaming at the top of their lungs. The nurses started laughing because they couldn't hear each other talk. Because there is only one examining table for the newborns, all babies from the 3 delivery rooms are whisked into the one room to be examined. There are usually at least two babies on the bed at the same time and sometimes more. This morning there was no one with the midwife to help so I grabbed the baby and wrapped him in a cloth and took him to be examined. One of the women had no one to care for her, to bring the baby's clothes or anything. After delivery her baby lay on the examining table for almost an hour wrapped in a doctor's gown. The mother also had no clothes or supplies so they literally taped 2 baby diapers to her! Oh my heart. I can just imagine how painful it will be to peel that stuff off afterward. Someone finally came and we got the baby changed into his own clothes and everything squared away. Another woman had "placenta previa" at 31 weeks and was in a lot of pain. Come to find out, her husband had died suddenly a month ago. They planned to observe her and possibly do a C-section if she bled anymore. I never saw the woman shed a tear; you'd think that someone who lost her husband and now was in danger of losing his child would be totally grief-stricken but everything here is "God's will" and they just accept it as that. I had my camera with me today so I snapped a couple pictures to show you the labor room (notice the rusty delivery table) and the baby bed with 2 babies being examined. I probably assisted in no fewer than 10 deliveries this morning! My body feels so beaten up and bruised. But I love every minute of it and can't wait to go back in a few days.

The Art of Entertaining, Kurdish style

For some time I have wanted to invite friends and have a big dinner party. But recently I lost my house helper and realized that this would be a huge job to do by myself. Still, I decided to take the plunge and started inviting...We ended up with 20 guests + 2 toddlers. I cooked for 2 days and still felt like I didn't have enough food. When one entertains in this culture, one is expected to have an abundance of food to show people how much you honor & love them. Thus, I had 6 main dishes, 4 salads, 4 desserts and fruit to finish off the evening. Of course at least 2 rounds of tea also. The trick was to come up with a menu that I thought they might actually eat. I was pleasantly surprised at the positive comments I received about the food! We began the evening by standing in a huge circle in the kitchen and giving thanks to God for the food and our friendship. Some commented on what a nice thing this was. After eating the main course, tea was served and awhile later the desserts, then more tea. When it looks like people are getting ready to leave, the fruit should come out. This is the last thing served in any gathering. Even after being in this part of the world for a long time, I still feel intimidated by the process of offering hospitality because they do it so much better & with seemingly little effort. There definitely is a protocol that they expect & I'm always afraid I'll mess up. When I came out with the fruit at the end, one guy said "now, I'm really impressed!" As if I had passed the test of proper hospitality etiquette. During the course of the evening, it was fun to watch all the camaraderie as some played a game in the kitchen, some sat and talked in the living room and others played with the babies in the classroom. (which opens onto the living room) It was a fun evening and though a lot of work, well worth it. I had help from a couple gals on our team and Darrell helped a ton with cleaning the house & washing dishes. All of the people that we had for dinner are on our "hit list" and we would love to see them join the family. Here is a picture of some of our guests playing a game at the kitchen table.

No country for the feeble hearted. by D.P.

Going to the Dentist is scary enough in a country with the best trained dentists with the latest equipment. So in a country where everyone warns you against the medical care, the last thing you want is a toothache. The last thing we did before leaving the States was to go to the Dentist and take care of our dental needs.
So it was no fun to wake up here one day with flu symptoms AND my teeth aching on one side. Of course I hoped that the aching teeth were caused by the flu and that when the flu went away my teeth would be fine. Nonetheless, I asked a 8 year veteran here who the best dentist was. He said his was trained in Germany but DID NOT have an x-ray machine. He told me the name of an Arab dentist from the capital and trained there who had an x-ray machine.
What to do? The known guy or the unknown with an x-ray machine?
When the flu cleared up and I knew I had a serious toothache,-I went with the x-ray machine. This guy's clinic is in his house. In the 3-week process of helping me,
he disclosed that his equipment was from the 80's but top notch stuff.
On the first visit I learned that he did not have the alleged x-ray machine, but he told me he could send me to the university for them or MAYBE he could pinpoint the problem without one. Cheryl had started me on antibiotics because I had swelling around my gums. The dentist and I thought we probably had found the problem tooth, but I still thought we were going for the university x-ray options to make sure, when he started drilling! Well, I hope he got this one right. No shots or anything. He said the tooth turned out to be dead. He drilled out an old filling and began the first step of a root canal. Now I thought that because this was just an "inspection", he had skilled some of the niceties of dentistry.
But obviously, he was going far beyond "inspecting." It was when he told me to "rinse" that I realized what was missing. There was no drainage tube hooked over my teeth and into the bottom of my mouth, nor even a bib.
Another strange thing is that he packed the "root canal" with a disinfectant that smelled like detol or pinesol. Not only could I not stand it; no one I talked to could either! It was on cotton down the root canal and then he blocked it in with another piece of cotton. He instructed me to replace the "retainer" cotton regularly with another pick of cotton, using a toothpick or a match stick.
In 2 days, I replaced it just once.
Now the story has a great ending. After 4 visits (all with no bib, no drainage suction hose, and no anesthetics) I went home with a good root canal and filling for $83.
The dentist had a very interesting story. He was kidnapped from his home down in the capital and ransomed with money. He came here looking for safety but found the housing too expensive, so he went back to the capital and continued working. Friends told him he would not be kidnapped again. But one day at his office, while changing the oil in the generator, 3 men came in and asked for the doctor. He knew they were kidnappers. He told me this is the ONLY lie he ever told in his life.
He said, "He's out to lunch. I'm the secretary." They left and he immediately moved here.
Back here at home during that time we had our pipes freeze. Now you know how in the States, this is no small problem. But here everyone's solution is, "Just wait till 11 am and the sun will thaw them out." Strangely, with no water due to frozen pipes, I go into our kitchen and find flies on the window and ants on the counter! What a place: the inconveniences of winter do not even spare you from the inconveniences of summer.
At one time, each of our teams' 4 houses had problems:
ours: water leading from inside the concrete bathroom floor down to the first floor.
another: no hot water. another: generator not starting, and the last: wires burned up so no electricity could come to the house. Like he said: "In America, wires don't burn up: breakers are flipped."
Such is life here. Never a dull moment.